The Secret Chronicles of Samantha R Puckett
by They Call Me Maddie Marie
Summary: The private journal of Samantha Puckett. Based off of AwkwardSquirrel's story a little tiny bit. Please R my second fanfic ever.
1. December 22

**for the amazingly super readers of 'annabel lee' i WILL eventually finish. trust me. i'm basing this off my own blog, which i based off another iCarly story by AwkwardSquirrel or something like that. i recommend you check out her story. but this is my take on it. k thanks. also like she did in her story i didn't mean for this to coincide with a specific year and as luck would have it i uploaded it on the date first mentioned in the story. :] gotta love coincidences.**

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**Tuesday, December 22  
**You know what I hate? That it seems NO ONE in Seattle owns a dictionary. Or anyone on the website FictionPress anyway.

I have an account on there (penname: AwkwardPieee., the period HAS to be included by the way), and I wrote this amazing story called To Kill A Rocking Horse, based off a book we read in English called _To Kill A Mockingbird._ I got so many reviews on To Kill A Rocking Horse that I wrote a sequel based off _another_ book we read, called _5 People You Meet in Heaven,_ but mine was called 5 People You Meet with Devin, one of my characters in To Kill A Rocking Horse. And apparently it's so popular that people are demanding a sequel to _that,_and I haven't even finished it (next book on my hitlist: _Oliver Twist._ I'm calling it Dawn Twist, my female character in To Kill A Rocking Horse).

But to get back on topic, I really think these people should, A, get a spell check going on, or 2, find a beta. I've offered to beta several times, but they all decline. Why? They think their stories are perfect. Read To Kill A Rocking Horse and get back to me.

But I have so many secrets I want to tell you. Not that you're a person. But I've never been able to truly confide in anyone before, without fear of being judged. I've tried diaries, yes, but they always seem to be read by someone.

Not this time. I've saved this onto my computer under the file 'The Secret Chronicles of Samantha R Puckett'. I would have added a period after 'R', but Microsoft Word just won't allow it. You also need a password to open 'The Secret Chronicles of Samantha R Puckett'. And, since no one'll read this anyway, I'll come right out and say that the password is:

annefrank.

You need the period at the end of that, too.

You may be wondering why my password has to do with a Jewish girl from the forties, but if I get to my secrets I'm sure you'll get the gist of things.

Well, secret one. I'm a bookworm. I'm not kidding. I slack off in school, wise off to people, and be the opposite of the real me, because Freddie, too, is a bookworm, and I know what can happen to people like us. That's why I'm also kind of aggressive, in case my secret _does_get out. So my password is annefrank. because she is one of my favorite authors, along with Anne Rice, Edgar Allan Poe, Harper Lee, Mitch Albom, and others. Stephen King is pretty good, too. I have a secret room in my house that you can't get to other than through a 'closet' in my bathroom. My _private_ bathroom. Which is why Carly and Freddie have never seen it. They're afraid to go in there.

Secret two. I love writing. Just like books. Which is why I have an account on FictionPress. I've already written To Kill A Rocking Horse, a kind of failure of a story called The Dragon Hide (not nearly as many hits and reviews as To Kill A Rocking Horse), Mysteries Unleashed, and, of course, 5 People You Meet with Devin. I really love writing. On FictionPress I, of course, use my account's penname of AwkwardPieee., but just to be sure, I also use the pseudonym Reyana Faye. I just don't want people to find out.

Secret three. I actually don't like ham as much as I say I do. I think you can figure this one out.

Secret four. The 'R' in my name stands for the first name in my pseudonym—Reyana. My mom with her 'originality' named my twin Melanie Reyna. It's like Reyana but without the first 'ah' sound. I really like my middle name, but I can't let anyone know that. In fact, I wish my name was Reyana Samantha instead of Samantha Reyana sometimes.

Secret six. Because of my writing dream, passion, hobby, whatever you want to call it, I have four laptops and two computers. I know it seems like a lot, but I slaved getting that money. It was so great when I got my first computer—the laptop I'm typing on right now. I immediately went on it and joined Neopets. I was like nine, can you blame me? But I totally loved that computer. The password on this computer is kind of similar to the password to this document, except the password is 'annerice.'. I have a thing for Annes. Just authors. Not actually girls named Anne.

And, finally, the mother of all secrets, here's number six—

Secret six. I have really cool but also really dorky glasses. You know the ones that everyone seems to be obsessed with—the nerd glasses, as they're called? Bingo. I have a pair. I usually wear contacts, but I still have glasses. I know that I shouldn't be ashamed of who I really am, and I'm not. I just have so much to hide.

And sometimes secrets are the worst thing.

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not the best first chapter in the world, but i've been writing this out since i first published annabel lee. it's just been sitting on my harddrive since, and it's gotten to be annoying staring at 'the secret chronicles of samantha r puckett' everyday, so i decided to finally publish it. AwkwardPieee. is actually an account i made on fictionpress and in a couple days, if you're interested, i'll put up to kill a rocking horse. just tell me. k thanks. it's going to get really good, trust me, this is just kind of an introduction.


	2. December 25

**i'm thinking about ending 'annabel lee'. i originally wrote it when i had writer's block but i wanna delete it. it's not that great imo. i'm also very worried right now. i found out yesterday one of my best friends is in the hospital, sick with cancer. i'm soo worried for her. i hope she gets better. MISSY, IF YOU'RE READING THIS, I LOVE YOU! DEMONS BE GONE! (inside joke)**

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**Friday, December 25  
**So how did I, Samantha Reyana Puckett, end up with a broken wrist on Christmas Day, one of the happiest days of the year? Well, I'll tell you.

Of course, it's Christmas, so Melanie is coming home. What a _joy_. She decided last night that we'd go Christmas caroling, then come back and eat fudge (that _she_ made) and drink hot chocolate (and guess who made _that?_). Of course, being the goody two shoes that she is, Mom caved, so we went caroling. And as luck would have it, Fredward was walking down the stupid Christmas Tree Lane right as the same time that I came down wearing my glasses, black Uggs, a Santa hat, green skinny jeans, a red shirt with a reindeer on it, and Melanie's stupid purple Majorette jacket.

"_Sam?_" Freddie asked in disbelief. Ahhh. Years of trying to keep my secret down the toilet (my glasses). And there goes my dignity, too. I seriously gotta 'accidentally' drop those things behind my mom's monster truck tires. She doesn't have a monster truck. Just the tires. Don't ask.

So I was kind of stuck between a rock and a hard place—the rock being run for it, the hard place being tell the truth. Or maybe it's the other way around. Doesn't matter. I was totally stuck. And I was totally embarrassed, considering what I was wearing. I felt my mouth drop open and my lower lip quivering. Ahhh.

"Uh, hey, Frederico, how's it going?" I asked.

"Sam—you look…uh…_festive_," he finished.

And I got really ticked, so I lunged for him. Melanie and Mom were totally speechless, as you can tell. I had him pinned. He was freaked out. Mom was freaked out. Melanie was freaked out. And I kind of was freaked out. But I didn't panic. I did what any person would do.

"Merry…" Kick in the side "…fricking…" Foot stomp on _his_ foot "…_Christmas!_" I yelled, throwing a candy cane at him and running for it.

I ran until I got back to my house. Never doing _that_ again. I totally had a long talk with my friends Ben and Jerry. Oh, and you know how nerds always have tape on their glasses? I guess nerds are stronger than Chuck Norris or something, because I could _not_ break those dang things. No matter what I did. I even considered getting a hammer, but I couldn't find one.

I think Mom is smarter than I thought and hid all weapons from me.

I swear, first thing tomorrow, these things are going to be under my mother's car.

But my mom and Melanie got back and gave me a candy cane. I introduced it to Ben and Jerry. Let me tell you: candy canes are much better when they're chocolate mocha flavored, dipped in chocolate fudge brownie ice cream.

But now it's Christmas morning, and we've all opened our gifts. I got a computer game by the way—_Sims 3_. In my _stocking._Thank you Santa. But we got a bunch of cool stuff, and I was actually feeling a tiny bit (less than miniscule, but it's still there) guilty because I had so much and some people had so little. A minute later though that feeling was gone.

My little cousin named Ben (short for Benjamin; ironically, he has a twin sister nicknamed Gerri, because her name is Geraldine) had come over like they do every Christmas. He's two. He had a remote control helicopter. And he's _two._ But he had the dumb copter and was playing with it. I wasn't paying attention and his stupid helicopter flew into my stomach. I fell backwards, onto our couch, and flipped over it, sticking out my arm to catch myself and ended up hurting it more than I had ever done before.

"Sam go boom! Sam go boom!" he shrieked in delight clapping his sticky little hands (he had been eating a candy cane).

Melanie ran over and helped me up, but it turns out _THE LITTLE PUNK BROKE MY WRIST!_ I was ready to strangle the little j.a. I don't care if he has the best flipping name in the world, he's still a little punk.

But Mom, showing a sign of actual parenting, rushed me to urgent care (that stuff's open on _Christmas._The world will never cease to amaze me) and the freakshow doctor talked to me like a little girl. "Well, Samantha, you did so well, you get a lollipop!" His exact words. But hey, it's sugary and rots your teeth. What the hey.

So I come home, with a cast on my wrist, and I look through my stuff. I've made one family on the _Sims 3_ and I named them the "Ice Cream" family. There's a gay guy named Ben who's married to Jerry, and they have a daughter named Boston (for Boston cream pie, my new favorite Ben and Jerry's flavor. Thanks Aunt Patty, the mother of the twin terrors, for that for Christmas. My family gets me). I played with them for about half an hour and I must say, their lives rock.

Well, I have to go now. iCarly tonight.

**~*~Later~*~**

I'm not speaking to Carly. I don't care what happens. I'm not speaking to her again. This...this is the first time I've cried since I had to get a job. It's soo terrible. I...I...I...I don't know what to say.

I walked into the Shay's apartment, slammed the door, and immediately startled groaning in pain. Cause I used my right hand, the one with the broken wrist, to slam the door. Spencer, who was in front of the sink, looked over.

"You okay, Sam?" he asked, coming over to me. He smelled nice...oddly. But anyway, I was still clutching my wrist, and there were still odd twisted little sounded escaping my lips. All I could do was shake my head no. Spencer looked at my wrist but still dragged me over to the couch. He told me to stay there and then he left.

I got up.

I went up to the iCarly studio. As I walked in I said, "Don't worry, I'm here, I'm here...I'm not dead," cause...well, I was later than usual. But Carly didn't seem pleased, cause, well, her eyes were on my wrist. And _what_ were the first words out of my so called "best friend's" mouth? The first two words out of my best friend's mouth when she realized I broke my wrist?

"Sam! _iCarly!_"

No, she wasn't worried I wouldn't be able to do _this _webcast, she was worried iCarly couldn't go on because of my wrist.

Really.

I walked right back out of the apartment and didn't look back.

And I know iCarly ended three hours ago, but you know what I've been doing? I've been playing my _Sims 3_with Ben and Jerry and Boston and I'm wondering how people on YouTube got their male Sims pregnant, because Boston's starting to look a little lonely, the poor baby. I could just adopt but then I can't name the kid Mocha if it's a girl or Dublin if it's a boy (ya know, for Dublin Mudslide).

I'm very ticked and my arm is very sore from typing all day, so I'm getting off for now.

**~*~Later~*~**

Melanie just brought me the mother of all sundaes: Ben and Jerry heaven. It was Ben and Jerry's ice cream, but it was chocolate fudge brownie and Boston cream pie mixed with mud pie and Dublin mudslide, with chopped up mocha chocolate candy canes on top. I call it "OH GOD" or "Heaven" or, my favorite, "chocolate cream mudslide pie and cane". It's delicious.

So when I was eating my sundae five mouthfuls at a time because it's so good, Freddork sent me an I.M. It shocked me, because I didn't know he knew my I.M. account, which just so happens to be mebesammy. And he said:

"Are you mad at Carly or something?"

Uh, no shizz.

So I typed out really quick, "Uh, duh. All she cares about is iCarly while I'm sitting here unable to use my wrist for six weeks."

"She was worried about you, too."

"So why didn't she come after me????"

He went offline.

Christmas this year just flat out sucks. Time to go back to chocolate cream mudslide pie and cane. Yumm.

**_--Me be Sammy._**

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**should i delete annabel lee? i'm just not into it anymore. sorry it took so long to post this chap. i've been busy with college (i go online in case you were curious).**


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